


Hanz' drag bar

by everlystarkey



Category: McLennon - Fandom, The Beatles (Band)
Genre: Drag Bars, Hamburg, M/M, McLennon, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-04
Updated: 2020-05-15
Packaged: 2021-03-03 06:02:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24010054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/everlystarkey/pseuds/everlystarkey
Summary: Paul visits a drag bar alone and witnesses something he shouldn't haveThe bassline of the music could be felt vibrating on the floor and up through my person, long and loud. Foreign bodies were packed on all sides of me seems to remind me that this was not where I was supposed to be at this time of night. Or at any time at that matter.‘I was only here for the cheap booze’ was the reasoning I kept repeating to myself in a vague attempt to add some validity to my actions and make myself feel better. ‘It's just because I'm skint, innit?’
Relationships: George Harrison & John Lennon & Paul McCartney & Ringo Starr, John Lennon & Paul McCartney, John Lennon/Paul McCartney, McLennon - Relationship
Kudos: 28





	1. Chapter 1

The bassline of the music could be felt vibrating on the floor and up through my body, long and loud. Foreign bodies were packed on all sides of me seems to remind me that this was not where I was supposed to be at this time of night. Or at any time at that matter.  
‘I was only here for the cheap booze’ was the reasoning I kept repeating to myself in a vague attempt to add some validity to my actions and make myself feel better. ‘It's just because I'm skint, innit?’  
Weaving through the maze of bodies, many of which were taller and wider than mine, I made it to the tacky looking bar. I didn't expect the patrons to look so...well, manly? Big, burly men were hardly what came to mind when you thought of people who frequented ‘Hanz Drag Bar’.  
Somewhat shakily, I took a seat on one of the high stools at the end of the bar, deciding to instead wait for the barman to notice me rather than calling him over myself.  
Other than cheap booze, I couldn't decide why I was here. Why a few pennies of a larger was worth coming to such a foreign place where my reputation could be so easily tarnished if I were to be spotted. Curiosity perhaps? Only I don't know if just curiosity would be worth the potential consequences. The Beatles: the band who were stopped and forgotten in Hamburg because a member was a fag.  
Only I wasn't a fag, I knew that because, well obviously girls were very much attracted to me. But still, would anyone be inclined to believe me if I was spotted in a place like this? Probably not.  
As I waited for the bartender, I looked around for a moment to drink in my surroundings. The whole place was decked out to look like a sort of palace. Red with gold accents, only the red booths and carpet was strained and ripped irreversibly from what seemed like years of neglect and abuse. The Gold which boarded the booths and lined the bar was dull and chipping off in places, revealing the metal beneath. The main focal point of the room was a stage at the back, directly facing the door with the bar to its left and the booths to its right. Wooden chairs and small, round tables occupied the space in front of the stage for those who wanted a closer look at whatever type of entertainments they offered here. The next thing that caught my eye was, once again, the patrons. Upon closer inspection, it was revealed that there was an array of personalities present tonight. The majority were middle-aged men, occupying some of the booths and stools, sat chatting together in such a familiar way that, if you hadn't read the sign when walking in, you wouldn't have been blamed for thinking it was just your average pub (mind the tacky decorations).  
Separate from the men were lads around my age all laughing and drinking. They were the minority of the bar but there was still a good few of them. They looked like me, dressed similarly and just hanging out together in the same way id do with my mates. Only not in this pub.  
I dread to think what would happen if the lads came to look for me and found me here. Only I don't think it is likely. I've wandered off many times and they never came looking, they most likely would just assume that I had gone home with some bird and would be back eventually. I couldn't stop the slight weight of anxiety in my stomach though.  
“Aight lad, what can I get ya?” the, surprisingly English, barman spoke as he walked over to me. He was tall and lanky but still had a good bit of muscle on his frame. From how he spoke and looked I couldn't tell if he was queer too or just happened to work here. “Um, just a larger please, mate,” I said, a slight tinge of uneasiness picking up in my voice, not unnoticed by the bartender.  
“First time?” he asked, ducking down under the bar for a second to retrieve a glass. “Can you tell?” I replied, all too quickly. Causing the man to laugh warmly, “well, you are a little nervous lad.” he smiled, pushing the larger over the bar with a coaster beneath it. “But I do know all the regulars so even if you weren't so shakey I would know it was your first visit.” he clarified, leaning forwards on the bar on his forearms. “See that stage?” he asked, nodding with his head towards the cheap stage. “Yeah, what about it?” I asked, taking the first sip of the cheap larger I had come here for. It tasted like the ones from other bars - it was probably so cheap because they wanted their few patrons to have a reason to keep coming and keep drinking. Making money by selling a lot for a small profit each rather than selling fewer for a larger one.  
“A drag show is about to begin. Give it five minutes or so.” he smiled, before leaving to serve a rather loud german man, 40 or so, who had gotten impatient waiting for our convocation to end.

A drag show? Never been to one of them before. 

As I drank more and more, I began to relax a bit. My brain finally becoming satisfied with the fact that, no, none of the band was going to miraculously turn up here and see me. They were probably balls deep in some bird they had met or were at least trying to get to that point if they were not unfortunate enough to pass out in some drain.  
The atmosphere was surprisingly homely. Loud laughter echoed off the walls and the music blasted. People had their arms slung over one another as they joked and drank the night away. Some men wore makeup and some didn't, no one seemed to care about the normal stereotypes they were supposed to adhere to.  
I felt as if I was safe here and I could explore and experience something new. Of course, I wasn't gay, I was firm in that belief and had never once questioned it. But still, I was curious. Not to try it out myself but to see what the whole scene was like. It was always presented as secretive and underground due to the illegality of it all and I was currently in the centre of it all. Finally seeing something that I was never meant to see. The whole thing was new and exciting and, despite probably being able to go home now and feel satisfied with what I had already experienced in this new world, I was going to get even more in the form of seeing a drag show. 

I sat and waited eagerly for the show to begin, despite the previously mentioned 5-minute wait it took around 20 minutes for the lights to dim and the three… women? To come onto the stage. Since then I had ordered a second, stronger drink and down it in record time before ordering yet another to nurse throughout the performance.  
The men were wearing extremely heavy makeup. Whole new eyebrows were drawn on above their old ones which had been somehow covered up. They also boasted bright eyeshadow that covered way more than just the eye as well as a lipstick that extended almost to their chin.  
Clothes wise they were wearing thigh-high black boots and very skimpy dresses that had high necklines to cover their fake breasts. It was...absurd but in a good way. I suppose the whole appeal of them was because they were over the top, extravagant. Seeing them made me feel a lot more overwhelmed than I thought it would, seeing these men grind and dance and blow kisses was very new and jarring in away. I couldn't describe the feeling I felt, but I couldn't look away. 

The show went on without me taking my eyes away from the stage. My drink stayed forgotten in my hands as I watched the queen's dancing around each other, drinking in the atmosphere.  
One of the women, the one that had been the lead dancer throughout the performance split up from the other girls. Leaving them to continue the sultry choreography alone as she stepped down from the stage and entered the audience.  
“Now boys!” she began, putting on a fake, yet oddly seductive female voice. Men around the bar cheered as she spoke “who wants a taste?” she winked, pulling out a lipstick from the side of her skirt.  
The cheers erupted even louder as she looked around for the lucky contestant, eventually setting her eyes onto a booth of young men in the corner, diagonal from me so my I could only see the bench furthest from me. “You?” she asked, smiling devilishly as the lads around cheered and pushed him up to stand.

“Aye go on then!”

An all too familiar Liverpudlian voice ginned as he was finally pushed up from the booth. My blood ran cold as my brain finally processed who ti was. John Lennon. My best mate John Lennon. Who was currently in a drag bar.  
Was this where he always went when he slipped away every so often? From him sitting in that booth with those men I could assume he knew them. Perhaps they all frequented this place together? It would surely explain why I don't recognise a single person there with him.  
I watch, stunned, as she leant forwards towards John and applied the lipstick onto his lips. Although the cheers were louder than ever around me, the feeling of the atmosphere seems to have drained away entirely from me.  
All of a sudden this didn't feel like some new thing anymore. Instead, it seemed like I was an intruder, a voyer. Seeing something my eyes were never intended to see. Leaving my now warm beer on the counter I stood up and left. Adopting a brisk walk until I was far enough away from the bar to feel safe. I was never meant to step foot in that place and now that I have a whole host of troubling questions have invaded my mind.


	2. chapter two

I went straight to our room after that. Climbing under the shitty blanket of the top bunk way before the usual time. Everyone was still at some normal bar whilst John was at the drag one. Doing God knows what. It felt almost as if I was some child who had been snooping around their parent's room, only to find something they weren't meant to before currying back to their bed and hiding under the blankets. As if it would somehow make it all go away.  
Was John really someone who swung both ways? Apart of me felt strange that I had known him for so many years but somehow not picked up on it. I mean I really should have, seeing how much time we have spent together and how close we were. Another part of me feels angry he never told me, despite me not wanting to know. Well, I didn't want to find out he was into men because I didn't want him to be into men. However, after tonight's events proving that he very much was, I felt a bit angry he never bothered to tell me. I wasn't judgemental, I looked up to John too much to ever turn my back on him, and therefore the band, over something so inconsequential. John never struck me as someone who cared about what others thought of him, so why didn't he tell me?  
I wasn't going to bring it up to him, I couldn't. From the second I left that bar I had come to the conclusion that I was going to pretend the events that transpired not even an hour ago had never happened. Because, even if I did want to confront john about seeing him in a gay bar, it would just raise all the more questions on his end. “well why were you there then, Paulie?’ I could already hear his reply, not taking the situation nearly as serious as I was.

That night, I went out again to one of the bars we frequented and bought some sleeping pills from the man behind the bar. Joseph, I think he was called. Normally, I bought a very different kind from him but tonight I much rather wanted to go to bed than see stars.  
After my head had hit the pillow, not even the racket of my bandmates coming in could wake me - I could hear them - but I couldn't register what they were saying or open my eyes, it was more indistinguishable noises coming out from the darkness. I also did not stir when I felt someone shaking my shoulder. It just stirred the dark purples and blacks of my dream.

_______________

Despite waking up from what was probably the longest sleep I had had since coming to Hamburg, my mind felt foggy and my head felt heavy. I leant against the wall on my top bunk bed, drinking a bottle of water and looking around my room at all my passed out bandmates as the memories of last night started to creep back into my mind.   
A grey light shone in through the thin curtains, I could make out more and more of the people around me as it slowly got brighter. John was sleeping on the bottom bunk of the bed on the adjacent wall. Laying on his stomach his head turned out towards the centre of the room, cheek resting against the pillow. I couldn't tell if it was just my mind taunting me or not but I could almost swear I saw the remnants of smudged lipstick around his mouth. A faint shadow of red, visible on the skin of his cheek from where he had tried to rub it off before coming home. Hardly noticeable, but still there.

Slowly, one by one, people around me began to wake up. First, it was Pete on the bunk below me, we just sat and talked until George, Stu and John woke up. All as groggy and irritable as they usually were so soon after getting out of bed. We never had any bookings in the day so we were free to do what we liked really. We could go look at the sights or go shopping for records round the city centre if we were up early enough, but it was rare for us to wake up before about 5. 3 was a definite improvement but still not early enough to get a bus into town before the shops started to close - it seems everyone had turned in early last night.  
We had only ever been into the city a few times, normally it was me and Pete going to explore when we wanted a change of scenery, it seemed the others never really got tired of the same dirt streets day after day.

John was as talkative as ever, chatting and poking fun at everyone as if he hadn't been having lipstick put on him by a drag queen last night. It felt strange watching him do it now but, truth be told, this was probably not the first time he’s done something like that and acted as if nothing happened around us the next day. This was most likely very common and I didn't know how to feel about it. I wasn't disgusted in it, more shocked. It seemed like John had a whole new aspect of his life he had never shown us all. Surely liking lads like you do birds were quite a big thing to hide and John had been doing it for a seemingly long amount of time. It was strange to think about.  
I wonder how far he has gone with a lad. Perhaps he had messed about with the other boys that had been in that booth with him. Maybe he had shared kisses in an alley, or perhaps done even more. What if he had brought one back to this very roo-

“Macca, out yer ‘ead please,” George said, bringing me back to reality by snapping his fingers in front of my eyes. “Ah, sorry,” I replied, shaking my head to rid my mind of the thoughts. It didn't matter if John brought lads back here, it didn't matter what he did full stop, it wasn't my business and I didn't know why I cared so much.  
The rest of the day dragged on slowly after that. Just sat about in our small room, playing our instruments and chatting about whatever was going on in our lives until it was time to start heading down to our gig. 

“Macca, fancy a smoke?” John asked, pulling out two cigs from his pocket. It was customary for me and John to go outside and chat and smoke together at least once in the day. We never spoke about anything of much importance but it was good to spend time together nonetheless. I had been grateful for the lack of change in everything after what I had walked in on last night. Of course, I doubted he saw me but still, things were not as awkward as I had somehow worked them up in my head to be. “Aye john,” I said, following him into the alley of the bar the others had gone to set up in. I pulled out a lighter and lit us up both of our cigarettes. Taking one to put between my lips, John did the same before speaking.

“You were in bed early last night, the bird turned you down?” he asked, taking a short puff of the cig as he leant against the brick wall. We were just far enough into the alley that the yellow light of the sunset stopped streaming in about a meter away from us. Leaving us in a comfortable grey light. “Just wanted a good sleep to be honest.” I lied, not leaning against the wall and instead just standing in the alley opposite john. I watched as he took the cig from his mouth momentarily, looking at me knowingly “really? But I could have sworn I saw you in that bar last night.” he said, smirking at me as he put the fag back in his mouth. He knew. He definitely knew.   
Before I could reply he spoke again, the cig hanging between his teeth. “I didn't know you were one of us, Macca. I mean I always knew you'd do well, comin’ with us, because of them pretty eyes you’ve got. But I never thought you actually would.” he finally finished. Taking the cig from his mouth and stomping it out on the ground. I didn't know how to reply. Of course, I wasn't gay but I didn't know how to explain that in a way that would be believable to him. How do you explain that you're straight after being spotted in a drag bar? “I-i, uh. I’m not a poof.” i defended myself. The just looked at me, the silence stretched across the alley until I felt a sharp pain in my fingers - my forgotten cig burning through the filter paper and onto my fingers. “AH FUCK!” I yelped, quickly dropping the cig onto the floor and wafting my hand in the air in an attempt to subdue the pain. John just watched on, as if he knew that was going to happen.

“Male strippers tonight.” he commented “meet me outside at 1 AM and ill take you to meet my mates you’ll enjoy yourself.” he grinned before disappearing out the alley, leaving me alone to my thoughts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> one more chapter to go, I am accepting prompts for future fics :)
> 
> Beatles Instagram: phe.starkey

**Author's Note:**

> hey :) I hope you enjoyed this :) there are three chapters and I hope to get them all out soon :)  
> my Beatles Instagram: Phe.starkey


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